It feels like forever since Caleb and I have had time for an adventure. I proposed a challenge to my dear boyfriend to plan the entire weekend, which also happened to contain Sweetest Day. Obviously it wasn’t a challenge at all considering basically the next day he had the entire weekend planned with schedule and everything. Friday: New Release of Nightmare on Elm Street and pumpkin full of flowers. Saturday: Renaissance Festival, dinner, then Haunted Hayride. Sunday: Putt-putt. I’m going to focus solely on the Renaissance Festival, though.
First off, in continuation with our evident poverty Caleb managed to get a discounted rate for the Renaissance Festival tickets when purchased online. I believe he spent around $16/ per ticket, where at the door they were close to $40 (I wish I would have paid a little more attention to the prices, but I will explain why I couldn’t focus upon arrival.) Alright we were off on our adventure to Harveysburg, Ohio and all along the way we discussed how we wanted the day to go. Our expectations were to see some jousting, drink some beer, and get a souvenir. Whoa… were we in for a shock.
Side Note: Now if you have ever been to a Renaissance Festival you will understand OR if you are one of these following people.. uh interesting past time..? Anyways.
We should had been prepared from the bumper sticker on the car in front of us that read “Royalty on board”, but we weren’t. About 75% of the people there were dressed up in these over the top Renaissance period outfits. (If you aren’t aware of what that means.. It’s a lot of tights on men, way to much boob showing on women, and fairy wings <- This left us baffled.) They ranged from royalty (head to toe clothing) to peasants (slutty) and some sort of middle class (middle-aged women to worried to be “slutty” and to poor to be royalty.) Either way, it was a spectacle, that’s for sure. But the backdrop village, castle, pirate ship, and jousting arena were amazing!
Side Note: There was so much detail that I sorta felt like I was back in that time period. For a split second I wanted one of those silly costumes (fully covered royalty, of course), but then I was brought back to reality by an overweight gentleman gorging himself on a large turkey leg while walking past.
Once you get adjusted to the scenery and stop staring at the “locals” you notice there are more than 100 shops on the property. They offer anything from fairy wings (yet again..”?”), costumes, jewelry, old fashion beer mugs, Viking furs (with two very large Viking men to stare at you as you enter their shop), commonly known food (but with strange names), and Wood Chuck Cider Beer. It was WONDERFUL, but very expensive so bring cash. Also, hope you don’t get too inebriated because it will cost ya a pretty penny. One of the things we decided to indulge in was getting a wax mold of our hands together. The process is quite painful, consisting of putting your arm in ice-cold water for 30 seconds then dipping it in hot wax about 25 times. In the end it was totally worth it and cost $10.
We managed to catch a few shows throughout the day, as well. The first one we were drawn to was a juggler/fire-eater with a crude sense of humor and an affinity for using sexual innuendos. He was very entertaining for about 20 minutes, but then I started to grow tired of this jokes about “balls” and the temperature, color, and amount of them he had. So we moved on to the pirate ship where 10 pirates and Shakespeare were telling a very funny story based off the board game “CLUE” and doing stunts off the ship. The third show was the Full Armored Jousting in which the best part was the incredibly intoxicated man behind us who kept shouting inappropriate things at no one. Also, one of the jousting sticks broke and flew into the audience and hit someone. Caleb and I thought that was pretty cool. The fourth and last show we managed to see was the “Mud” show. This is where three half naked men jumped around in mud and the unsuspecting viewers in the first 5 rows got very dirty. It was very odd, but also awesome with their sexual innuendos and full-out hilariously raunchy jokes. Needless to say.. I don’t believe the Renaissance Festival is made for ages 13 and younger, but that didn’t stop those amazing parents from sitting their young children in the front row. Idiots.
Needless to say, we managed to keep entertained for a full 6 hours at the festival and it was totally worth the $16/each. We went on the final weekend, but the festival runs from Labor day weekend through mid October. Each weekend is themed and on the final weekend “Market Weekend” everything is on SALE! Information about the Renaissance Festival can be found at renfestival.com.
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